A recent article from somewhere online probably said something about how many hours of video games youth from the ages of 13 to 18 play each day. But the truth is, I didn’t look it up and you don’t care! All you care about is the fact that the teenager in YOUR life seems, for lack of a better word, addicted.
Video games can be extremely fun. They are more socially acceptable than ever before. They are often inexpensive for how many hours of entertainment you get. They are convenient. But…they also seem like they might not be all good. Addiction definitely feels like the correct term.
As a former youth and now as a parent I have been on both sides of the accusation, “All you care about is video games!” So those who care about the spiritual and mental well-being of teenagers (whether parents or churches or teenagers themselves) are naturally curious: What can we do? What should we do?
A good place to start is by seeking to understand why so many teenagers are drawn to video games. I’d suggest that video games are so attractive and addictive because they offer to fulfill our desire to feel competence, connection, and control.
1. Competence
The causes of video game addiction are still under debate. But many psychologists and psychiatrists will readily admit that the reward mechanisms of games are capable of producing the loved/hated “dopamine hit” that underlies so many addictive behaviors.1
Even without a biological framework, most people who enjoy games would agree that video games are unique in their ability to allow us to improve in a task or to develop our skill in a controlled environment where progress is consistent and measurable. The next level/task/step is usually clear and progress is virtually guaranteed.
2. Connection
Second, video games offer a sense of connection to most players. I believe that most teenagers who play video games are drawn to the communal aspect of their gaming. Playing games with friends can be an incredibly memorable and relationship-building experience.
But even single player games offer you a connection to in-game lives, NPCs2, or a community of people who are equally committed to the same game, love the same world, and speak the same vocabulary. It was no surprise (to me) how many people who had never seriously gamed before were drawn into the world of Animal Crossing: New Horizons during COVID lockdown to spend time with pretend animal neighbors.
3. Control
Thirdly, video games appeal to so many, especially teenagers, because they offer a strong feeling of control. Gaming provides uninhibited autonomy and a clear sense of dominion over your actions, choices, and world.
Some games provide this through the ability to create and customize your character, a feature that is absolutely essential for modern games to succeed. But it goes beyond that to the playing of a game itself. Video games appeal to our innate desire for control with their ability to save, to reset, to control characters and decisions and world altering events in ways that are generally impossible in real life.
Now you might be wondering if any of that is bad. Don’t we all want competence, connection and control? That’s true! The problem is when we seek those things on our own, apart from God and His will.
In the famous story of the tower of Babel, early humans gathered together and hatched a plan to build their tower because of a desire for these same three things – competence, connection, and control.
Now the whole earth had one language and the same words. (2) And as people migrated from the east, they found a plain in the land of Shinar and settled there. (3) And they said to one another, “Come, let us make bricks, and burn them thoroughly.” And they had brick for stone, and bitumen for mortar. (4) Then they said, “Come, let us build ourselves a city and a tower with its top in the heavens, and let us make a name for ourselves, lest we be dispersed over the face of the whole earth.” (5) And the LORD came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of man had built.
Genesis 11:1-5 ESV
Notice how the people sought to increase in competence by showcasing their technological advancements after the flood to build something greater than had ever been built before in the world God judged and destroyed.
The people sought to solidify their connection by building for themselves a city and community so they would not be dispersed to fill the world as God wanted.
And the people sought to gain control by stacking their way to the heavens above to make a name for themselves, not God.
In a sense, video games attempt to fulfill deep human desires that have existed for as long as humanity itself. But as in the land of Shinar, video games often tempt us to pursue the fulfillment of these desires without the thought of God. And they also offer to do that in a way that is much more convenient than most “real life” alternatives. Certainly far easier than building a huge brick tower.
For example, In a video game you can achieve competence without pain or danger. You can feel connection without covenant or commitment. And you can exert control without responsibility and accountability. In moderation that isn’t necessarily bad, but when this aspect of gaming is what becomes most compelling and addicting, video games can quickly grow into a problem – an escape from the real world and a space to indulge in unhealthy desires and self-centered practices.
So how should we then respond? As Christians we might be tempted to simply keep our teenagers away from video games or interactive media, to prevent access or shut down that pathway altogether. There may be some wisdom in that.
But while I readily acknowledge the dangers of video games I also think that they can provide a valuable opportunity for the gospel. If we can understand the draw of video games on the teenage heart, we will be able to better understand how the gospel of Christ is good news to the teenager who seems to “only care about games.”
Here are a few ways that could work:
First, Christians can affirm the truth that God has created us to grow in competence and to progress in life towards His goals.
One of the most profound concepts of the Christian worldview is a linear view of history. Christians believe that things happen for a reason and are progressing in our lives and world towards God’s divinely appointed ends. In this plan, we as individuals get to grow and change and participate to a degree in the world that God is making.
Paul wrote about this in 2 Corinthians 3.
2 Corinthians 3:18 ESV And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.
This gospel perspective gives incredible meaning to our struggles and trials to grow in the grace of God and progress towards glory. And it unlocks the great quest of becoming more and more like Christ by the power of the Spirit.
Second, Christians can offer the hope that through the gospel we can experience true connection with God and others.
It’s no secret that connection is God’s idea – a reality experienced by the Trinity and made possible for us by Him. In John 17, when Jesus prayed for believers to be one he was offering a connection to Christians that is meant to unite us with one another and the divine.
John 17:20-21 ESV “I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, (21) that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me.
Connection is a wonderful thing. It is meant to be fully found in relationship with God and love for one another that is made possible by the gospel. Because of that we can forgive, live at peace, and have true fellowship.
Third, Christians can correct the lie that being in control is better than trusting the one who is truly in control.
A desire for control is at the heart of worry. We as a society are in a full-blown anxiety epidemic, with over 30% of teenagers in 2024 meeting the clinical criteria for anxiety disorder. A professor of Psychology at Harvard Medical School has recently argued that this epidemic is not caused by a disease, but by an intolerance of uncertainty.3
The gospel is the metanarrative that allows the Christian to face massive uncertainty with equally massive peace. Uncertainty and lack of control is part of this world. Video games don’t change that – they simply cover it up for a moment. But since God sent his own son to die on the cross for our sins and guarantee for us a future and a hope, we don’t need to be in control of this world because we belong to the one who is.
Romans 8:28-29 ESV And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. (29) For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.
Video games are part of our world and aren’t going anywhere. But their tremendous attraction can help us better see the heart of a game-addicted teenager and bring the gospel of Jesus to bear in that incredibly important place.
Ultimately, the call for those who are spiritually concerned for teenagers who spend countless hours gaming is to understand how the truths of the gospel apply to the draw of video games, to believe those truths, and then to proclaim and live them faithfully.
And know that if and when you do these things, your teen(s) probably won’t just stop playing video games ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
But they may begin to be wiser in how they approach them. And by the grace of God, they might begin to understand that what video games offer so enticingly in virtual worlds can only truly be found in the Creator of the world itself.
And if He grabs hold of their hearts, then who knows? That teen who only seems to care about video games may one day care even more (as hard as it can be to imagine) about the goodness and glory of Jesus Christ.
This article is part of our Teen Mental Health Series.
Photo Credit: Kelly Sikkema
- The Argument for Video Game Addiction | Psychology Today
- NPCs (Non-Playable Characters) are characters in the game that are not controlled by the player but by the game itself. NPCs often serve a variety of roles, such as providing information, selling items, giving quests, or adding to the story.
- https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2023/10/when-fighting-anxiety-is-worse-than-pointless/