Larissa Lam believes God orchestrated her many unexpected career changes. How else would a Chinese American teen decide to be a music producer? Or become the lead singer of a band while CFO of a record company? And now, Larissa is the director of a documentary called Far East Deep South, an award-winning documentary feature film that follows a Chinese American family on a surprising journey through Mississippi in search of their lost family history.
In this interview with SOLA Network, Larissa shares about her faith journey, as well as her thoughts on Asian American representation in the music industry. She also shares how churches can support artists, especially musicians. All of it, of course, is tied to her belief in God as creator who is sovereign over all things.
Our “Artists in Motion” series hopes to platform Asian American Christian artists, as well as encourage all artists to root their identities in Christ and use their callings to share art and truth with the world. Find the other installments of our “Artists in Motion” series here.
Watch the trailer for Larissa Lam’s documentary Far East Deep South:
Editor’s Note: Below is an automated transcript of their conversation with very light editing. There may be typos and other discrepancies from the video. You can listen to the audio here.
SOLA Network: Welcome to SOLA Network. I’m sitting with Larissa Lam, artist, filmmaker, music producer, music artist. And we are going to be talking about her new documentary film Far East Deep South. But before we do that we wanted to hear just a little bit about her story. Larissa, wonderful to meet you. Wonderful for you to be here.
Larissa Lam: Thanks for having me.
SOLA Network: I would love to hear, how did you come to know Christ? What’s your testimony? It sounds really exciting to hear.
Larissa Lam: Well, you know, it’s funny that you say it sounds exciting to hear because I never thought I had a really exciting testimony. And I grew up in a Christian home. So from as long as I can remember, I remember, you know, my parents, taking me to church on Sundays. And of course, we’d always be late for some reason. I’m sitting in the balcony of a Chinese Methodist Church in Chinatown. And I just kind of always knew there was a god. But honestly, it wasn’t until I had two cousins who were from Hong Kong, who moved in with my family, I’m an only child. And when I was about 10 years old, they actually took me to youth group. And my parents were kind of Sunday Christians. So, I don’t think I really saw, you know, kind of a daily walk with the Lord until I saw my cousins, you know, coming to live with me. And they brought me to youth group.
And I remember hearing a sermon by the youth pastor that talked about forgiveness. And it was something that really resonated with me in terms of knowing that God will forgive us, no matter what we’ve done. And, and I think those are words like I never really heard. Like, you know, I’m sorry, at home, you know. I think your parents teach you like, “Oh, I’m sorry” you know, if you hit a kid accident, like, right, like, you should say, you’re sorry. But you kind of do it just for the sake of doing it. But to understand the true meaning of forgiveness. I think that moment, is when I really embraced Christ.
SOLA Network: Wow. As a former youth pastor, that’s very exciting, always to hear. And then where along that journey of growing in faith, did you kind of discover yourself as an artist, as a musician? What was that like?
Larissa Lam: Well, I was brainwashed into thinking I would be a doctor when I grew up, because my dad was a doctor, and I got good grades. So, as a typical Asian American, the push was okay, you should be a doctor. And I started to realize when I was about 16, that I did not like the sight of blood. I did not like the sight of guts. You know, anytime I saw a TV show, I’d see the surgery scene, and I’d cringe. And then I started to slowly realize, like, maybe I shouldn’t be a doctor. So I’ll do the next best thing. I’ll become a music producer.
I honestly believe it was some type of divine inspiration. Because why in the world would an Asian American girl like myself think that they could even do anything in the entertainment industry, let alone become a music producer. So, you know, I remember breaking the news to my parents. And that was really scary. Because all my life I had been groomed to become a doctor. And I told her “Hey, Mom and Dad, guess what, I’m not going to be a doctor anymore. Okay, I’m going to be a musician.” You’re going to starve. They said this in Chinese, of course. So I had to kind of help my parents reorient their brain a little bit.
And it was really scary. I mean, I think, honestly, if I had been born White and male, I probably wouldn’t have gotten into entertainment because for me, I really felt like I didn’t like a lot of the content I was seeing or hearing on the radio. I really felt there was a challenge to be, like one of the first and only like, you know, Asian Americans to go into the music industry specifically. And so somehow, I don’t want to call a naivety or just gumption on my part. But I just said, you know, what, I want to make a difference in the entertainment industry. So I’m going to be a music producer. I’ve been making music and writing music since I was 13. But I have no idea how I’m going to get in the industry, and I’m going to learn everything I can to do that.
SOLA Network: And how did music kind of play in your faith? Right, because you said you started writing when you were 13 but you became a Christian? A little…
Larissa Lam: Yeah, well, I think with, so with the faith elements of it, I think it goes back to what I was talking about with content you know. I think there were a lot of worldly lyrics and content that I saw on TV that I didn’t feel like reflected my faith. And even though I didn’t necessarily, at the time, think I would go into the Christian music industry, I certainly knew as a Christian, I wanted to make music that was more edifying, that was more glorifying to God, and it didn’t need to necessarily be overtly Christian, but it was just something that I think reflected my morals and my Christian perspective and worldview.
And so that’s kind of how I had my attitude in terms of wanting to shine a light into the darkness, you know, to be the salt, and that has kind of been my motto since I went into the entertainment industry. It was really driven not by fame or success, because honestly, I mean, I could make a lot more money doing something else. If you want to seek fame, you could just put yourself on YouTube doing something stupid, right? Or something scandalous and you could be famous. But for me, it was really about representing Christ, and really reflecting a message that would be honoring to him.
SOLA Network: So at the time, you’re an Asian American female solo artist trying to make music. What was that journey? What was that struggle to even get that first single out there?
Larissa Lam: Well, you know, going back to this strange journey, and also how you can see God’s fingerprints in my life. I didn’t set out to be an artist, I set out to be a music producer. And sadly, the reason for that was because I didn’t see somebody that looked like me in front. So I thought, well, if I’m behind the scenes, you know, it won’t matter that I’m Asian, right? And for me, I grew up kind of “idolizing” certain, idolizing in the fingertips sense, because obviously I was worshipping God, but of you know, Quincy Jones, Babyface. You know, there were so many music producers that I actually had great admiration for. Like in college, I had a giant poster of Quincy Jones in my bedroom. Like what college kid has posters of music producers in their room? So I already kind of looked at the behind the scenes, the art form of that. And so I worked at recording studios, which happened to be one of them, which in a studio was owned by a fabulous, you know, Christian, world renowned mixing engineer.
And so I had an interesting start, you know, I really admired music producers, and I figured if I was behind the scenes, no one would know I was Asian, it shouldn’t matter what my ethnicity is. And so I set out to be a music producer, but also had sights on, you know, running a record company or being behind the scenes as an executive.
So my first job out of college was actually as a financial controller of a record label, a Christian label, called NSoul Records. And we did EDM music back then. Which they put out, one of the most well known groups that they did was Nitro Praise. And so this is where, again, it was a God thing. I had a business economics degree from UCLA. That was my negotiation with my parents, “Okay, look, I’m gonna get a real degree. It’s going to be okay. I’m going into entertainment. So anything, you know, if all else fails, I’ll use my degree.” So I did get to use my degree in the entertainment industry. And I was the financial controller and eventually became the chief financial officer of the record label.
So while I was at the record label, they had started doing the concert tours for Nitro Praise. And the lead singer actually dropped out of a major, it was actually a crew back then it was still called Campus Crusade College Conference. And they turn to me because they happen to know I sing. They said, hey, Larissa, do you want to, you know, fill in for the lead singer? I’m like, okay, sure, you know, they’re paying for my ticket, they’re paying for me to go like, okay, I’ll do that. I thought it was gonna be a one off thing. I ended up staying with the group for the next two years and touring the country while I was running the record company.
So I actually got this nickname, the singing CFO. And that was a God thing. I mean, really, it was at the right place at the right time. And I kind of fell into that. And, and a lot of, I think my career, I, I hate to use the word like fall into things, but I really feel like God has been guiding my path. Because, you know, a lot of times, like, maybe I had my plans, or I have my goals of where I wanted to go. But in the end, God opened up a different door, you know, for me to walk through. And then a lot of times, if I look back, he was preparing me for that the whole journey. Because I had been singing, I sang on all my own demos. I mean, I had been singing since I was like eight years old, and even in public. But again, I never thought I’d actually have a chance of having a career, you know, in music because of my ethnicity. And so the fact that I was able to sing in this multi ethnic, you know, group and tour the country and do music ministry was a huge encouragement and maybe affirmation that this is a path that I should be on.
SOLA Network: Yeah, I think that’s amazing, right? Because for a lot of Asian American emerging artists, they feel so alone, right like that. There’s no path that’s in front of them. You know, how have you seen the industry kind of change both the secular music industry and the Christian music industry when it comes to Asian American artists?
Larissa Lam: Oh, let’s see, how much time do we have?
Well, I think with the mainstream industry, you’re starting to see a change. It’s very slow. And here’s where, from personal experience, we’re going to see how things develop in the next few years with Asian American being an identity that all of a sudden some people in the industry are discovering for the first time.
I’m talking, you know, not Asians, of course. Because, you know, I was a voting member of the Recording Academy, which runs the Grammys, and I was at an after party one time at the Grammys, after attending the Grammys. And I had a conversation with an executive who happened to be Black with an Asian girlfriend. And he was running a music network. And I was like, Oh, you know, hey, we’d love to talk to you more about having more Asian American artists on your network. And his response to me was like, oh, we’re playing Kpop artists, which kind of basically let me know that he thought, well, if we just have Kpop representation that kind of encompasses all of Asian American. And he didn’t understand the distinction between Kpop and all other Asian, you know, groups.
And then I mean, and I had a very similar experience where I had a dance single called, I Feel Alive that we’re pushing into the clubs. And I remember my radio promoter was saying, like, you know, what, one of the DJs actually saw your single cover, and said, like, Oh, she does Kpop? And I’m Chinese American. First of all, I don’t speak Korean. And the fact that somebody would just judge me, basically, oh, all Asians do Kpop, this is the new stereotype. Unfortunately, I mean, I’m happy for the success of Kpop. Because I think it has opened some doors for people seeing, but I think there’s a complacency within the general music industry, like, Oh, we’ve got Kpop, they’re successful, that’s all the Asians we need.
And, and that’s unfortunate, or you have, you know, and again, not to take any away from H.E.R. or Anderson .Paak, who are half Asian, you know, but again, I feel like there’s this, there’s still a wall where it’s like, oh, well, you can be biracial, and we’re cool with you, you know. But if you’re full East Asian or full, another, a Southeast Asian, you know, like, we don’t know what to do with you still, unless you’re in like an Asian pop group.
And so there’s still this education process that needs to happen between, you know, somebody Asian American, like me, or you, and somebody that is overseas, Asian. And you know, and all these other in betweens, right.
And in the Christian industry, that’s a whole other ball of wax. We need to have a serious conversation with our brothers and sisters, if they are really trying to embrace the diversity that is still painted in Black and White. And I also, you know, they’re trying to involve a little bit of our Hispanic, Latin brothers, sisters as well. But just speaking Spanish isn’t enough, like, you know, to sing in a song. I mean, there’s definitely a diversity issue, and inclusion issue that needs to come to the forefront. And certainly, because of my experience in the music industry, on the Christian side, as well. It’s something that I plan to have some more conversations with our friends who are in the gospel music industry.
SOLA Network: Well, you know, I, as a youth pastor, I have seen waves and waves of really talented young people, because they learn music for praise team now to get into it. But I think one of the questions that we’re trying to face in this series is, how do Asian American churches support those emerging artists? How do, you know, lead pastors and executive pastors and church systems…You know, in your experience, like how can the Asian American church help these new young artists to find their voice?
Larissa Lam: Yeah, and I’m so glad you asked that question. Because that was my thinking as kind of the next step. So here’s some of the things that I’ve kind of seen. And you know, I spent nine years hosting a TV show for TBS, Youth Network, JC TV, you know, Pastor Rich Wilkerson Jr. was a co-host. And I also saw a lot of other high profile pastors and music artists, you know, you name a lot of major art, music artists, or authors, I probably have interviewed them.
And one thing I’ve noticed is that the Asian Church has a PR problem. And I know it’s kind of a dirty word. For some of our churches where, you know, as Asian culture, we’re trying to be humble, and we’re trying to not bring attention to ourselves. And yet, I see kind of our White counterparts and our Black counterparts in the Christian side, like very much a lot of times whether it’s pastors, you know, promote themselves. And so, you know, let’s not even talk about Christian artists, let’s look at even like prominent pastors on a scale in terms of the US. So we can probably say, Francis Chan is the biggest name in Asian American pastors. Yet, I know, a lot of great, just to say that I know a lot of great pastors who are friends of mine, who are fantastic speakers, have written books, but yet they don’t have the same platform, you know.
So I think one of the things that the church can do, you know, not just for just artists, but even for like, whether it’s pastors and you know, other people is to not be afraid of marketing and promotions. I mean, I think the thing about it is you sure you have to be careful you’re not boasting or bragging or doing anything that’s unbiblical. But at the same time, you know, there is branding and I know these are dirty words because you think you’re worldly, but there is something to the fact that if there is a message that you believe in, which is we have the gospel, you know, there is something about doing something with your brand as an Asian American to position yourself in the marketplace. This is the Business Economics part of me that is talking. And I know like, this is gonna scare some, Oh my gosh, she’s talking so worldly, and all these, like, you know, marketing jargon, what is going on?
But the other thing is, you know, in all honesty, as someone who has performed on major stages, I would like to see, this is something hopefully I’ll be able to help with, but increasing stage presence. You know, performance, like worship, is one thing. And, you know, when I do a lot of worship workshops for churches, you know, all across the country, and one of the things I see is the distinction for a lot of Asian churches, and, you know, not all but a lot of the worship teams is, again, there’s this, these great singers, and, you know, these great worship leaders, but sometimes there is not a strong engagement with the audience, you know, and yes, it’s a vertical, it’s a vertical, relationship. And so you’re not performing for the audience. But there’s also something about kind of drawing in, you know, an audience and the good worship leaders, regardless of ethnic background, do a good job of, you know, maintaining the vertical relationship in worship, but at the same time bringing in and drawing people to come along with them in that vertical relationship experience and encounter with God, right. And so, those are things that we can improve upon.
In terms of trade. I mean, let’s just boil it down. You know, forget everything I said about the specifics, but just the idea is that a lot of Asian churches don’t invest in worship training. And so there’s discipleship and mentorship, I think that needs to happen. And whether that’s with other Asian artists or with non Asian artists, I think there could be a greater investment in that area. And if you see, like, Hillsong, and you see some of these other churches, they are actually just putting out their own music, and they’re supporting their artists, and they’re putting money behind it, and putting them at different conferences and camps, and again, goes back to the branding and the marketing and all of that.
And so you don’t have to be as large as a machine to say, Hillsong is, but those are the things that if we want to kind of penetrate it is strength in numbers. And certainly, it’s also educating the Christians that are not Asian of the fact that Asian Americans are the fastest growing group of Christians, not just in the US, but around the world. And so they are missing a massive market, from just an economic, I mean, sadly, we of course, want everything to be purely spiritual. But from a terms of when you’re talking about presence, and visibility, it all comes down to marketing. Okay, oh, my gosh, I’m talking about marketing, what is going on? It should just be about Jesus, you know, and it is about Jesus. But, you know, you’re asking me about how we can support. So these are the things that I think from a practical standpoint, the church can do a better job of supporting and investing in those areas of training, and even promotion and marketing of our community.
SOLA Network: Yeah. And I think as we see, you know, Asian American churches growing not just in Asian American numbers, but you know, more and more non Asian Americans come flocking to Asian American churches. I feel like when you said that, that thing about like, Oh, it’s not like pure, it should be purely spiritual. One of the things that I’ve discovered is there’s this theological disconnect between, you know, pastoral theology and creative theology. And what that means I would love to hear kind of in your journey of being creative, of making music, of making a feature film, what are some of the ways in which you’ve come to understand God, deeper, richer, because of your creative artwork?
Larissa Lam: Yeah, I mean, first and foremost, we have to acknowledge that God is a Creator God. And he’s the author of all stories. I mean, you look at the Bible, you look at our stories. And God is great, you know, he created everything. I mean, if you just look at the Genesis and everything that he did within the first six days, right, and so if we were making this image, we are reflecting the ability to create as well. And so I think a lot of times there is this disconnect, where like, Oh, we just have to study scripture, and we just have to, you know, do the best to just preach the gospel and do all those things, and all the commandments, which is true. And I’m not saying we don’t do those things.
But at the same time, I think as I become a filmmaker, as well, I mean, first writing songs, that’s, of course, a reflection of my relationship with God, or how I see the world as a believer. And then now as a filmmaker, I realized like with our documentary, Far East Deep South, I mean, I didn’t really write that. I mean, if the series of events that unfolded, those are things that just happened, which I give credit to God. I mean, I couldn’t have written as good of a story as God wrote, and even if we look at our lives and our daily lives and what God has done for us. I want to be able to reflect that in my storytelling. I think all of us should reflect in storytelling.
I mean, we are encouraged to tell our testimony or to proclaim to the nation. What are we proclaiming? Yes, we’re proclaiming what, you know, our moment of Christ encounter for the first time. But we are also sharing the testimony, the whole Bible is sharing the testimony of not just that moment, you know, on Damascus Road, it’s about everything that happens after, you know, we become a Christian and everything that happens in our life, the trials, the tribulations, the triumphs, and, you know, and that’s how I think as believers, we can express the testimony is through different creative means and storytelling.
And so I think it’s very, very vital and important, because not everybody is going to show up for a sermon. You know, not everybody is going to be diligent in necessarily even reading a book, that’s a Christian book, you know, let alone the Bible. And so I think it’s important for us to be able to express and to share God in all his fullness in various art forms.
SOLA Network: That’s so powerful. And I think that one thing I’m discovering is, you know, Asian American church, we tend to really talk a lot about salvation, which is great, but we don’t often talk a lot about sanctification and that journey after that you’re talking about. How did you start this filmmaking process? I know we’re gonna talk a little bit more about this. But I would love to hear kind of, especially as that film came together, and as now you’re really rolling it out. What’s some of the surprising things that you’re discovering about what God is doing in our world right now?
Larissa Lam: Well, I believe that God is present today. I believe he’s working constantly in our lives. And I don’t know about everybody else out there. But I’ve had so many moments in my life where, you know, I call them God incidences, but you know, where things are seemingly random are like, wow, that’s really cool. And then you realize it’s like, no that’s kind of like God saying, like, No, you should pay attention. You know, there’s a reason these things happen. And I think in a film, without giving away too much, we find significant things in the middle of Mississippi.
We were on a family vacation to find my husband Baldwin’s grandfather’s grave site. He knew nothing about his grandfather growing up, because my father in law grew up without a father. And we just knew he was buried in Mississippi. And I literally thought we’d find you know, one, well, actually, two Chinese men, his grandfather and great grandfather buried in Mississippi. We show up and have no idea there was a whole population of Chinese, who had lived over generations in the Mississippi Delta. And we’re subject to the same Jim Crow Laws of the time as the Black community. And furthermore, we find some very important artifacts.
And I guess for this, maybe I will give it away, we find a Bible in the middle of Mississippi. Yeah, I mean, we always joke it could have been a dictionary, it could have been a store ledger, it could have been anything. And we found a Bible. And, you know, maybe for another family that wasn’t Christian, it might have not mattered. But for Baldwin’s dad who became a Christian when he was in the Air Force, it carried a lot of significance to him on many levels.
And that was kind of the beginning of like, okay, God, what are you trying to tell us? And then all these other events happened, where it felt like a movie. And I mean, I wasn’t a filmmaker. I had directed plays. I used to be the drama director at my church. I had produced and edited and directed short form videos, and music videos. But I never imagined doing a feature length documentary.
And the thing is that the series of events that happened kind of wrote itself in a way that obviously, people need to see this. People need to hear this. Because maybe not everybody has to be a Christian to watch the movie. They don’t even need to believe in God. We’ve had a lot of people that are atheist that have watched the movie. But at least like, maybe it would sow something in their mind: Maybe I didn’t believe in God. Maybe there is a high power that helps the family along their journey. And so I was very motivated to tell the story through film, because God gave us a story.
SOLA Network: For you and your life, reconciling these different identities, being Asian American, being Christian and being female, for that 16, 18 year old, who’s right now in that same place, and thinking about this life as an artist, being intimidated… What would be your encouragement to her about, you know, from your experience?
Larissa Lam: Well, I would say to any artist and certainly if you’re that young person that’s out there watching, you know, first and foremost you have to go into entertainment for the right reasons. And I say that from the business side. I think, as a creative artist you can be creative, regardless of what occupation you do. But if you’re truly looking to make it a career, or even a full time ministry, and sometimes those are both the same, because honestly, all of us are called to ministry, those who are believers, so regardless of your occupation, but for those who want to do this full time, as a ministry as well, you need to treat it as such, you know, because there are a lot of trappings of the entertainment industry that will detract you, you know, if you pursue it for fame and fortune, you are going to be sorely disappointed. If you were pursuing it for the glory of God, and because you want to make a difference, and you want to shine a light into the world, then that is the right motivation, because you will be tested.
And you will also just be, you’re not going to be, you’re always going to be measuring your success against the world. But if you measure your success against the people you’re influencing, you know, yes, creating art is important and telling stories is important. But at the same time, being able to reach people with that art and touching lives. That’s actually the most important like, what are you going to do with that art? Why are you doing it? Those are the things that I encourage you to think about as you’re going into it, and have a support system around you. Think of yourself as a missionary. You are now going out into the world and have yourself a prayer team around you who will pray for you.
I mean, that’s another thing. Going back to the other question about how churches can support. We have to treat our creative artists too and I would even say this, again, it’s for anyone who’s in any type of vocation, but especially our artists, it’s like, treat them like your missionaries, surround them with prayer, surround them with support. Don’t throw them out into the world and be like, okay, best of luck to you. We’ll see if you make it or not. Give them the support to be able to succeed and give them the support to be able to continue to make the art you know, even though commercially, I mean, I know I talked a lot about marketing but like let’s take that all away. But like there are missions organizations that you know, that we’ve been a part of that are dedicated to fostering and you know, helping to support artists who are missionaries in this world. So like, those are the important things that you should have: purpose, mission, support.
SOLA Network: Thank you so much, Larissa. I really appreciate your time and it was very inspired. For those of you watching, Far East Deep South is going to be rolling out on various platforms. So check SOLA.network for how you can watch it and I hope it is a blessing to you as it was to me.